Authenticity in a world that lost it.

The Challenge of Being Truly Authentic.

How hard is it to be truly authentic?

The answer is: incredibly hard. But then again, is anything meaningful ever easy? Authenticity, by definition, requires overcoming obstacles. Yet we often focus so much on the obstacles themselves that we fail to see them as opportunities for growth.

The challenge of choosing authenticity.

When I look back, the happiest moments of my life weren’t when things were easy but when I overcame seemingly insurmountable challenges. Each time, I found myself more aligned with who I truly was.

The problem is, we’re wired to focus on obstacles and often slip into a victim mentality. It takes time to shift our perspective and see obstacles as opportunities for self-improvement.

Authenticity isn’t about simply being yourself, it’s about becoming yourself, even when the process is painful.

The Journey to Authenticity.

Two years ago, I moved to Austria, and at first, I felt lost. I knew challenges were coming, but I underestimated how deeply they would shake me.

Within a month, everything had changed. Even though I was only a two-hour drive from my home in Croatia, it felt like I had left everything behind - my friends, my familiar routines, my sense of belonging.

The world I tried so hard to remain a part of was well and truly gone.

I had to rewire myself, and in doing so, I began my real journey toward authenticity.

At the time, I didn’t fully realize it, but I wasn’t just moving to a different country - I was running from myself. I had just graduated college, feeling lost and directionless. The walls of my old life were closing in, and I was terrified of being seen as a failure.

Growing up, I had learned that I was only valuable when I achieved something - good grades, perfection, external validation. So, moving abroad felt like a bold move, something others would respect.

But the truth was, I was running from responsibility.

This wasn’t just about adjusting to a new country; it was about stripping away everything that wasn’t truly me and figuring out who I really was.

The Role of Struggle in Self-Discovery.

Looking back, my struggle with authenticity started long before Austria. It was deeply rooted in my childhood.

My home was emotionally cold. My father was disengaged, and my mother was distant. The only time I felt seen was when I was the “perfect” child, the one who excelled, behaved well, and met expectations.

But as a deeply emotional and creative person, I struggled in that environment. There was no space for expression, no room for imperfection.

So, I learned to bury parts of myself. I adapted. I became who I was expected to be, not who I truly was.

There were plenty of defining moments. The divorce of my parents, moving out at a young age, taking care of my alcoholic father - each experience shaped me.

A serious injury ended my dream of playing football, something that wasn’t just a sport to me but my truest escape, my most authentic expression of self.

Losing my best friend at sixteen was another turning point. These moments could have broken me, but in a way, they built me.

They were signals. Signals telling me to stop playing a part in a world that didn’t fit me and to start being who I truly was.

The Cost of Pretending.

When I arrived in Graz, I hit rock bottom. I went through a breakup, lost two jobs, and found myself nearly broke. It felt like there was no way out.

Adapting to a new life.

But deep down, I knew I wasn’t going to give up. Somewhere, buried under all the pain and confusion, there was still a part of me that was real - my authentic self. It had been buried under layers of expectations, but it was still alive.

At one point, I thought: Let me just make it through tomorrow and see what happens.

That mindset shift, just focusing on the next step - it led to something unexpected. Instead of fighting my circumstances, I started to embrace them.

I realized that everything that hurt me did so because I was living a life that wasn’t truly mine.

I was chasing external validation, trying to fit into a world that didn’t align with who I really was.

Finding a Space for Authenticity in a world that lost it.

Authenticity is rare in today’s world. It’s not that people don’t value it, it’s that society makes it hard to embrace.

We live in an age of constant comparison, instant gratification, and superficial validation. The pressure to conform is immense, and stepping outside that pressure means taking a risk. It means being vulnerable. It means potentially losing people who expect you to play a role that no longer fits.

But here’s the truth: If you’re surrounded by people who don’t value your authenticity, you’re in the wrong space.

That’s why I now see my struggles as a blessing.

Moving away from my old environment gave me the chance to reinvent myself on my own terms. Without external expectations weighing me down, I was able to ask myself:

Who am I really? What do I actually want? And most importantly, Am I ready to accept the cost of being authentic?

The Answer to Authenticity.

So, is it hard to be truly authentic? Yes, incredibly so. Especially when you belong to a group; whether it’s family, friends, or your workplace - that defines your identity for you.

When your surroundings don’t align with your inner self, taking that first step toward authenticity feels impossible.

But I was lucky. Despite everything I went through, I was given the opportunity to step outside my comfort zone and build something real.

Now, having walked a few miles down this path, I can say with confidence: The world has lost authenticity. Or rather, it no longer prioritizes it.

But that doesn’t mean it’s gone. It just means you have to be willing to carve out your own space, to find the people and places that celebrate authenticity instead of punishing it.

It’s tough, but it’s worth it. Because in the end, nothing meaningful is ever easy.